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Pahrump's newest four-star restaurant, Bubba Grump's Bistro, hosted a VIP sneak preview last night in anticipation of tonight's grand opening.

Restaurant owner Bubba Grump learned the food business first-hand from his father and grandfather, who often turned road kill into tasty delicacies.

"The secret to good food," said Grump, "is to find one stellar ingredient and build on that.

"The desert tortoise delivers the richest taste and mouth feel of any meat I've previously prepared. Plus, they're slow and easy to catch," he said.

No one need worry about the extinction of these succulent creatures, as all the desert tortoises at Bubba Grump's are farm-raised.

The breeding stock comes from concerned citizens who find these tortoises homeless, without habitat and sometimes harmed.

If the injured tortoises can be saved, they are nurtured back to health for breeding; otherwise they go straight into the cooking pot.

Local developers seem to have a great compassion for these animals as they are by far the largest contributors to the farm.

Some of the items on the lengthy menu include: boiled, broiled and baked tortoise, deep-fried tortoise, tortoise with salt cedar sauce, tortoise fricassee, Parmesan tortoise, tortoise stew, tortoise and dumplings, tortoise stir-fry, blackened barbecue tortoise and Cajun style tortoise gumbo.

The tortoise sampler plate is served with a side of sweet potato fries to clear the pallet between bites and the tortoise sushi will surely bring joy to transplanted Californians who will eat just about anything wrapped in seaweed.

The breakfast menu is served all day and includes a hearty tortoise-egg omelette.

The Flagman, Ray Mielzynski, said it sounds like the perfect meal to begin a day of observing court cases and is substantial enough to eat before walking up and down the main streets of town while waving the American flag.

He used the occasion to officially announce he is running for Nye County Sheriff in 2010. "The fourth time is the charm," said Mielzynski.

Grump's appetizers are limited but delicious. Diners are encouraged to start their meals with baby tortoise on the half-shell, fried pupfish or crispy fried spotted owl legs with dipping sauce.

Diners at the bistro's sneak preview included Mark Smith enjoying the tortoise curry. "I couldn't wait to sink my teeth into those tender tidbits," said Smith, delicately using a fingernail to clean the last delectable piece from his right molar.

Paula Glidden asked if she could be served tortoise on a stick, "like something you'd get from the fair."

Al Balloqui requested his own recipe called the "economic developer." The dish calls for a tortoise dug up from its winter slumber and cast into boiling water for up to 12 hours, then smothered in butter.

Tim Hafen ended his meal with a dessert named in his honor, desert tortoise ambrosia a la Artesia, a slow-simmered dish covered in cream.

Jim Marble, Butch Borasky and Dan Schinhofen asked they be served a conservative dish. "We would like something that tastes more like chicken," said Schinhofen.

Mary Ellen Garmpoli and Jolene Haworth, both of whom wrote detailed desert tortoise environmental plans, chose fingerling pupfish. "We're sick of tortoises," said Haworth.

Gary Hollis tried the tortoise sampler plate. "I love it," he said. "It's all-you-can-eat."