Savvy Pahrump businesses are taking advantage of the flood of tourists flocking to Alien Planet in the Paradise Oasis Mall and the town's new Water World family park located next to the baseball fields on Highway 160.

* Cook's Ice is now offering frozen tortoise entrees, packaged for quick take-out meals. Terry McCaslin was seen there chomping on one of Cook's new frozen bananas on a stick followed by a strawberry snow cone. Holly Hernandez and Gail Smith enjoyed icy foot massages after a hard day of work.

* Nye County School District Maintenance and Operation Supervisor Bob Whimpey announced the refurbishing and expansion of the student car wash and lemonade stand on the corner of Basin Street and Highway 160.

"Since we completed these permanent structures six months ago, we have been able to fully fund our scholarship program," said Whimpey.

"Now that we've added an additional bay to our car wash operation, the kids will be able to double their sales. We only need $12,000,000 more for a new middle school."

"We want to thank the students in Nye County for their generous donations," said Deb Pemberton, supervisor of the Nye County Animal Shelter. "The number of animals housed at the county shelter is at an all-time low, because of the free spay and neuter clinics funded by the school district's lemonade stand."

* Pahrump Rentals has a new fleet of heavy equipment for use by qualified operators to keep up the increase in construction in all parts of the valley.

"We've also brought in a new line of tools in designer colors," said shop supervisor, "Espi" Espinueva "We're more than just a macho place to rent guy toys. We want the ladies to have a good shopping experience, too."

* BBV&E LLC INC. started a new bottled water firm, NYE WATER PLUS^TM located directly downstream and downwind from the Yucca Mountain storage facility. "We laugh at the possibility of groundwater contamination," said Carol Bird, public information officer for the firm.

"This water is clear as it can be, plus having the added advantage of glowing in the dark so you don't have to fumble around turning on lights to find it after sundown."

BBV&E is booking on the fact that the water will become a collector's item, like Billy Beer which was canned for a short while during the Carter Administration.

Call for special pricing on case lots for those considering bringing suit against the government facility in the future.

The newly formed consortium of BBV&E bears no earthly relation to Beckett, Boruchowits, Vitto and Ernest. Little brainpower was wasted and no animals were harmed in the reporting of this bogus news item.

* ALOHA, the laid back Hawaiian clothing and surfboard shop opened last year by Charlotte Uyeno and Chuck King, has moved to expanded quarters in the Paradise Oasis mall.

The staff at ALOHA is offering free surfing lessons for children at the wave pool at the new Water World theme park. King, the chief technical officer, said the best part of his job is being able to wear flipflops to work. Publicity Director Mark Waite, who got the job because he already owned a closet full of Hawaiian shirts, was snapping photos of bikini clad models for a new ad campaign.

* Tom Saitta is appearing nightly at Big T's Country Bar and RV Super Store. "Tom really draws people in," said Will Terry, owner of the store. "I just sold a 78-foot fifth wheel to some folks who dropped by for a quick beer."

* Ray Wulfenstein's miniature bowing alley is so popular he has added a miniature tennis court to his sports complex at Wulfy's. On closer inspection, the new court looks quite similar to the top of a ping-pong table laid on the floor.

* Charlene Dean, who proves you can take the gal out of the south but never the south out of the gal, has successfully launched a weekly show, called Alrighty Then, on TV Channel 41.

"We pursued Charlene because of her quirky personality," said station owner Vern Van Winkle.

"Viewers just love the way she says, 'ippy skip' although no one has any idea what it means. Plus, what's not to like about a show that combines wine tasting, jewelry making and southern cooking."

The laugh track on Dean's show is locally produced, featuring Brandy Minnick's giggles and the full-blown laughter of Debbie Hayes. The track will soon be released on CD for use in hospital wards. "It's better than pills for enhancing serotonin levels," said P.A. Tim Tarrant from Advanced Medical Center.

* Feather My Nest, a small kiosk featuring objets d'art and tiny pillows made from spotted owl feathers operates from 10 a.m. until 9 p.m. at the new paradise Oasis mall on Highway 372. Owners Mary Balloqui and Teri Clark are now interviewing sales assistants. Margaret Haines was seen browsing through the unique items for slot club giveaways.

* Leather 'n Lace, a joint venture between Marie Wujek and Maryann Yorke, is located in Pahrump's Paradise Oasis Mall next to Saddle-Mart. L 'n L features custommade handbags, chaps, concealed carry vests and whips, all made from soft and supple desert tortoise leather.

The partners harvest their leather from the dumpsters behind Bubba Grump's. It is naturally tanned, using all organic materials. "Nothing goes to waste on those buggers," said Wujek. The shop also carries flannel shirts and skinny jeans.

* McCaw's Exotic Tie Shop, located in the Paradise Oasis Mall, is a dream finally realized for propriety Jim McCaw. "A guy's gotta stick with what he knows," said McCaw, who was wearing a wide, hand-painted silk tie depicting a colorful desert sunset. "I like wearing art, and ties are a lot less painful than getting a tattoo."

* Two award winners, photographer Horace Langford, Jr. and journalist Don McDermott will be signing copies of their coffee table book, entitled "Prose And Motion", at the upcoming Authors' Extravaganza at the Pahrump Community Library.

The rich full colors of the action-packed sports photos combined with the concise and sometimes biting descriptions and behind the scenes comments make for a great read. However, it is the subtleties of Langford's black and white subjects that make the book a collector's item. Available at major outlets, including the PVT book store.

MERGER NEWS:

* Dan Rodriquez and Jeremy Jensen jointly announced the Pahrump Nugget has officially changed its name to the Pahrump McNugget. For event information, call Lori McDoller.

* Cookie Westphal at the Pahrump town office and Tracie Blacketer, owner of Mom's Family Diner have signed an agreement to open a small bakery inside the diner called Cookie's Cookies.