TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER The Bookworm Sez Advertisement

The alarm clock is not the noisiest thing in your bedroom each morning.

Every day when you get up, your hips creak. Your spine groans. Your fingers clatter like piano keys in a Bugs Bunny cartoon. As you make your way to the kitchen for a cup of sustenance, your body protesting the whole way, you wonder what's next.

According to author Diahann Carroll's new biography, "The Legs Are the Last to Go." The memories, as you'll read, stick around too.

Carol Diann Johnson was born in Harlem in 1935 to parents who seemed ill-prepared for a child. Still, little Carol was protected, coddled, and encouraged to showcase her burgeoning singing and dancing skills as she eagerly mimicked her favorite big-screen glamour girls.

Carol's mother, her biggest fan, demanded perfection and a ladylike demeanor from the young star.

Inspired by Lena Horne and other actresses from Hollywood's golden years, Carol went to college to study music and arts. She adopted the name Diahann Carroll and began performing in front of appreciative audiences. She was photographed for magazines. She appeared on Arthur Godfrey's Talent Scouts TV show and was invited back several times.

Before long, Diahann Carroll was in high demand on stage and screen.

But while Carroll's career was blazing, her life was in ashes. Her first marriage was broken because of an ill-fated affair with another actor, despite the fact that Carroll had a new baby and a husband who still loved her. Her second marriage was a quick mistake. Her third marriage didn't last long, either, nor did other love matches with men who were soul mates and some who were soul hates.

Incredibly, although her personal life was filled with drama, Carroll's career continued on an upward trend. Every time she began to believe that her performing days were over, another opportunity came along.

Even now, at age seventy-something, Diahann Carroll still performs for live audiences.

Feisty. That's the best word I can find for "The Legs Are the Last to Go", but I think I would have liked it more if it had less chest-thumping in it.

Carroll gives readers pages and pages of delightful gossip on stars from decades ago and stars who grace the tabloids today. Even younger readers will be enthralled by tales of dining on the Onassis yacht, standing up to racism in Hollywood and blazing trails on-stage.

The distraction comes when Carroll waxes diva-like. She writes about conflict with other stars and how she confronted directors and producers when things didn't go her way. She repeatedly talks about "couture," make-up and luxury cars, saying that she can't live without them. Her blithely near-blameless attitude when writing about family problems made me cringe.

If you can ignore the braggadocio and focus on the fun in this book, it's a pretty good bio from someone who's walked an interesting path and optimistically looks toward the future. If you can't bear another Look-At-Me bio, though, "The Legs Are the Last to Go" is a book to kick to the curb.

"The Legs Are the Last to Go" by Diahann Carroll, Amistad, $24.95, 273 pages.