TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER The Bookworm Sez Advertisement

So, let's say you have a dispute with your neighbor.

Maybe you're doing something he thinks is infringing on his rights. Maybe he's just really bugging you.

The dispute goes from backyard muttering to name-calling to just short of violence.

He calls the cops. You call the cops.

If the new novel "Hollywood Crows" by Joseph Wambaugh was real-life, one of the community relations officers would wearily stop by your house and try to restore "quality of life" for you both. Too bad the quality of job is lousy for them.

When an opening in the community relations office (or CRO, pronounced "crow") comes up, all Hollywood cops vie for the job. It's seen as an easy assignment, smoothing disputes and rousting drunks from rich neighborhoods.

No shoot-outs. No burglaries. No traffic chasing.

And no excitement.

Officer Veronica "Ronnie" Sinclair became a "crow" at the urging of her family. The job isn't what she wants forever, but her partner, Bix Ramstead makes it easy to stay for now.

Bix is a sweetheart, and Ronnie thinks he might be a rarity: a monogamous cop. When Bix starts drinking again, though, Ronnie's not so sure. Something odd is going on with her partner.

For "Hollywood" Nate Weiss, the job was temporary. Once he gets his Big Break in show biz, he's outta there.

But now, auditioning is far from Hollywood Nate's mind. A beautiful woman with hair the color of butterscotch has become his obsession. She invited him to dinner. She flirted with him. So why won't she call him?

When small-town girl Margaret Osborne moved to Hollywood, she ran into the same problem as thousands of other hopefuls: Fame was elusive. To pay the bills, Margaret became Margot, an exotic dancer at the Leopard Lounge. With hair the color of butterscotch, she caught the eye of Ali Aziz and eventually they married. Now the couple is splitting and it's not pretty.

Margot has custody of their son and half of Ali's assets. Ali wants Nicky and he'll do anything to get the child.

But Margot's got a plan of her own and she's got help. You know what they say about birds of a feather...

Every now and then, I get so excited about a novel that I put everything else aside so I can read it. "Hollywood Crows" was one of those books.

I loved the way this novel unfolds, with multiple characters and several story lines that come together in one big whoop at the end.

Wambaugh has a way of breaking your heart on one page and making you laugh three paragraphs later, and his storytelling style compels you to dig in your talons and never let go. He's the Grand Poobah of Police Novels, and this is one you shouldn't miss.

If you want to read an arresting book with lots of action, great story lines, and irreverent humor, you'll love "Hollywood Crows".

It's the perfect book for a vacation flight, winging around on errands, or for just relaxing back at the nest.

"Hollywood Crows" by Joseph Wambaugh, Little, Brown, $26.99, 343 pages.