MARSHA GOLDSTEIN Life Matters Advertisement

This is the season of gift giving and hope for a new year filled with promise. Why not give yourself a gift?

The gift I am referring to is the gift of therapy. It is a gift because you are giving yourself the opportunity to deal with problems that cause emotional distress.

We do not live in a bubble. We have spouses, family, friends, co-workers and other relationships that are affected by the way we feel and act. When you are having a problem that is making you feel overwhelmed, it is very hard, or even impossible, to step back and look at the bigger picture.

Family and friends may try to come up with a solution to your distress because they don't want to see you going through a hard time. A family member or friend may suggest ending your marriage because things have gotten out of hand and walking away, in their opinion, is the best thing. Another friend may insist that you have to stay in a marriage no matter what the circumstances.

No doubt, the opinions are given out of caring and concern. However, the opinions are slanted based upon personal experiences and belief systems. It is very important to remember that you are the only one living your life and have to live with the decision you make.

Therapy has given some people their voice that has been lost over the years. Others find strength to conquer fears that have plagued them and have diminished their capacity to live a fulfilled and happy life. The gift of therapy is unique. It is not a cookie cutter affect.

People engage in therapy for different reasons. Some feel unhappy most of the time. Others feel nervous, anxious or overwhelmed. Some people have been victims of sexual abuse during their lifetime and have not come to terms with the trauma and seek closure. Others engage in therapy because of guilty feelings about not being a good spouse, parent, daughter, son or caregiver.

Divorce and death of a loved one also brings one into therapy to sort out feelings and get on with their life. Biological families have their own problems at times; blended families sometimes have a double dose and need help learning to live together. Others engage in therapy because they seem to make the same mistakes over and over again and want help to understand how to break the cycle.

The therapy room is a very unique room. It allows a person or persons to express their thoughts and feelings in safety and confidentiality. A trained professional mental health provider is non-judgmental. You will not hear a therapist tell you that you need to do this or do that. A trained professional therapist will suggest what he or she feels is in the best interest of the client.

A therapist may suggest that a client see a medical doctor for an existing condition, or to rule out a medical condition that may be contributing to their problem. However, a therapist respects what is called self-determination.

What that means is that the therapist and the client need not always agree or see things the same way. The therapist will respect that and work toward the client's goals because it is the client's life.

Working through one's difficulties is like opening a door that has been stuck for a very long time. Once that door is open, just imagine the possibilities.

Marsha Goldstein, L.C.S.W., BCD, is a licensed clinical social worker, board certified diplomate. She has a private practice here in Pahrump and can be reached at 775-751-9579.