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April 9, 2004
Uncle Sam's unwelcome visit
There was a time when I waited until the evening of April 14 to file my tax returns - when I had a job where I actually had to pay Uncle Sam at the end of the year. That was to make them wait until the last possible moment before taking more of my money. It was the heady days of the 1990s when my certificates of deposit paid almost seven percent interest. Nowadays, I'm usually entitled to a refund, so I get that tax form off to Fresno, Calif., fairly quickly after I get my forms in January. This year, however, I was expecting a little more of a refund than my calculations came up with, since that uncle seemed especially greedy during 2003. I wouldn't mind paying taxes as much if they went to something tangible I could see, like a light rail system so I wouldn't have to battle Interstate 15 traffic and smog going into Las Vegas. Or a good medical facility in Pahrump might be a positive use for my federal tax dollars. Instead, it will go to some faraway war, buying some high tech piece of military equipment that will be obsolete in several years. Or it could be spent on a project like Yucca Mountain, which, after the government spent several billion dollars, could still go the way of the Superconducting Super Collider project in Waxahachie, Texas, which the government walked away from in 1993 after spending $2 billion. If I could appear in front of some Congressional committee on taxation, my testimony might go something like this: Senator Dingleberry: Mr. Waite, tell us about your plans to reform the tax code. Mr. Waite: Certainly Senator. First of all, we could increase the standard deductible, currently at $4,500 for a single person. Let's double it to, say, $9,000. That way the poorest people would get the sharpest reduction on their taxes. Everybody would ultimately benefit. Senator Dingleberry: But how would we pay for that tax cut? Mr. Waite: A recent study showed 90 percent of U.S. corporations paid no income tax. Let's get rid of all those special, corporate tax breaks and make them pay, like us poor schmucks have to pay. Senator Dingleberry: But those big corporations contribute huge amounts to my campaign. Why, Amalgamated Consolidated Consortium Incorporated last year donated $350,000 to my successful re-election campaign. They'd expect something in return. Mr. Waite: Exactly the point, Senator. Now for another suggestion: Why not include a one-page questionnaire in every income tax form asking Americans their opinion on government spending. For example, we might list the major spending categories. Like defense, how about we tell Americans how much we spend on it, and ask them to circle their multiple choice answer if they want to a) spend more on defense, b) spend the same amount or c) spend less. Every working American fills out an income tax report; that would be a great way to sample American opinion. It could be just a non-binding survey, like a straw poll, or better yet, make it binding. Senator Dingleberry: But that sounds too simple. We need to make it complicated. Mr. Waite: I figured as much. Senator Dingleberry: Thank you for your testimony, Mr. Waite. Meeting adjourned. Then, suddenly, my dream ended and I was back in Pahrump. My economics professor in college used to poke fun at tax preparers, saying anyone could figure out their income taxes. But I have to admit, an accountant found me a generous tax break in 1997 after returning from a year in Australia. I didn't have to pay any income tax in 1986 on income paid by my employer in Texas, since I lived outside the U.S. more than 300 days. I got enough money back to buy a used Ford Escort. It can be a real unpleasant surprise, however, to find out you owe Uncle Sam money years after the due date. Those interest rates rank up there along with the loan sharks. The prospect of getting that income tax refund check can make going to the mailbox more interesting this time of year. One woman in Pahrump called the Pahrump Valley Times office, concerned about reports by a neighbor who claimed there was somebody driving up their street one night checking mail boxes, right near tax time. This year when I opened the mailbox and was surprised to find two checks from the Department of the Treasury: the income tax refund I calculated and a second check for $1 with no explanation. Why I received the second check for $1 I have no idea but I'll take it. I wonder how much it cost a federal payroll clerk to generate that $1 check. Write to Mark Waite at mwaite@pvtimes.com |
